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many men claim to practice what they preach when they merely preach what they would have you believe they practice. in the last analysis we must be judged by what we do and not by what we believe. we are as we behave – it is our actions which reflect our characters - with a very small margin of credit for our unmanifested vision of how we might behave if we could take the trouble to.
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Rape culture is a term or concept used to describe a culture in which rape and sexual violence are common and in which prevalent attitudes, norms, practices, and media normalize, excuse, tolerate, or even condone sexual violence. Examples of behaviors commonly associated with rape culture include victim blaming, sexual objectification, and trivializing rape.
this week Alison Saunders of the
Crown Prosecution Service confirmed that how jurors see women and victims of
rape is often influenced by rape culture and the media’s portrayal of victims.
While steps are being taken to address it Ms Saunders concedes that many jurors “still subscribe
to the myths and stereoptypes that we have all had a go at busting”. In other
words jurors look at the victim’s behaviour - was she drunk, what was she
wearing, did she flirt with him, did she go home with him… the list goes on. As
most rape victims know their attackers, jurors focus on ways she may have lead
him or the warning signs she should have seen. This culture is reinforced in
many ways. We would all advocate people looking after their safety and
wellbeing but the annual Christmas ads reminding women not to drink too much,
or get in dodgy cabs endorse the view that if something then happens to her,
it’s her fault for putting herself in that situation. Young men aren’t taught
what rape is. Men are never reminded to not drink to the point where they don’t
recognise consent.
In a recent case in Ireland a man
admitted rape and said “I’m sorry, I’m not a bastard. I
have feelings”. He said he drank 13 cans of beer, three pints, six shots, three
double vodkas and smoked a cannabis joint before the incident. In fact, his drunken behaviour
was taken into account when being sentenced. Mr Justice Paul Carney said it
was the “experience of the court” that a young man taking the amount of drink
that he had, along with a cannabis joint, could wake up the next morning
unaware that he had committed homicide or rape. However, the Irish Times website
makes sure the reader is in no doubt that the woman, the woman who had been
raped, had drunk ‘large amounts’. As always, a judgement is being cast on her
character.
It was this kind of reporting
that was raised recently at the Leveson Inquiry. If you weren’t lucky enough to
be able to hear the evidence as it was given, I would strongly encourage anyone
to read the full hearing transcripts online. As part of their
evidence Marai Larasi from End Violence Against Women raised a Daily Mail report about six footballers who
were jailed for gang raping 12-year-old girls. The rape was described by the
Mail Online as an ‘orgy’ and the victims as ‘Lolitas’. The clear implication is
that the girls - not women, girls - invited the rape. It was their behaviour
that had allowed the rape to happen. This article was problematic in placing
some blame on the girls, but also in sensationalising what happened to them.
It’s no longer a rape, it’s an orgy, something exciting and sexy. This just
feeds opinions already in the media about the sexiness of youth and girls and
the abdication of responsibility on the part of men who rape. What does reading
this teach young men? What does it teach women about their behaviour and value?
I like to try and be optimistic.
I believe that things can change. Just today a friend reminded me that she’s
hoping to change the world two people at a time by teaching her 2-year-old son
and soon-to-be-born second child how to treat people with respect. It’s hard to
know how to address rape culture in our society. You’d like to think that the
media can change but tabloids love a sensational story. Today, my heart
probably sank lower than it’s been in a while with the storm that erupted
around University Lad’s site unilad.com. The site’s now gone down, with an attempt at an
apology on the holding page but the rape ‘jokes’ and violence against women
discussed on the site was appalling. The example which provoked the storm ended
And if the girl you’ve taken for
a drink… won’t ‘spread for your head’, think about this mathematical statistic:
85% of rape cases go unreported.
That seems to be fairly good
odds*
*Uni Lad does not condone rape
without saying ‘surprise’.
Much of the site seemed to centre
around ‘lads’ telling tales of their conquests, but the references to rape just
being ‘surprise sex’ or a ‘struggle snuggle’ and the attitudes towards drunk or
vulnerable women were a constant. This, if it needs saying, is the next
generation of educated, young men. These are university students, a few years
from entering our workplaces. These are the young men that the current
generation of young women are meeting in bars, online, in class. It would be
nice to dismiss the site as small but their Facebook page is ‘liked’ by over
69,000 people - a staggering number - and the apology statement quickly
attracted over 280 comments, most in support of the site and dismissing rape
jokes as ‘banter’ and ‘lads talk’. This is rape culture in action.
This is a showcase for attitudes towards women and rape amongst educated, young
men in the UK. Still, I have to believe it can
change. The reaction to the vile nature of the stories on Unilad gave me hope
that the people who were disgusted by it far outweighed the people who support
it. Plus, in drawing attention to their site and forcing them to take it down
for a while maybe, just maybe, some of these men will rethink their comments.
Rape culture is
something that urgently needs addressing in our society, but maybe by
continuing to talk about it and call it out, we can change it.
Lori Halford
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