street harassment

The following post is written by Leah Pickett taken from: http://www.chicagopublicradio.org/blogs/leah-pickett/2013-10/standing-street-harassment-108847

"Standing up to street harassment

Every day, women (and men) are harassed, followed and publicly objectified on city streets.

Harassment shows its ugly face in many forms: a bully at school, an abuser at home, an underminer in the workplace, or an army of trolls online.

However, perhaps no form of harassment is more overt or troublingly common than catcalling: the whistles and kiss noises, the staccato beeps of car horns, the whispered or shouted evaluations of someone's physical appearance on the sidewalk, and the many other forms of street harassment (stalking, groping, leering, etc.) that women continually receive in public spaces, often on a daily basis.

I have experienced public objectification—whether it be whistle and a wink, a double tap of a car horn, or an unwelcome comment on my body that sends a tiny shiver down my spine—every single time that I go out walking in Chicago.

It doesn't matter which neighborhood I'm in, whether I have makeup on or not, if I'm wearing a miniskirt or a baggy sweatshirt and jeans.

Without fail, a complete stranger (usually a man or group of men, although women in their company have occasionally joined in) will take the time out of their day to put me in my place as a woman magnified through the lens of rape culture: a female specimen to be ogled, disrespected, and dehumanized as nothing but an object of their gaze. 

Most of the time, I ignore them and keep walking; because isn't that what you're supposed to do? Other instances break the straw holding together an already fragile day, and I want to hide or scream or cry. I want to yell back that my body is not theirs to claim, that I'm more than just a piece of meat to be verbally chewed and torn apart for sport.

My look is more skinny nerdgirl than glamazon; but even if I did choose to wear high heels and skintight dresses every day, I still wouldn't deserve the "Hey, sexy" and "Mmm, lookin' good" whispers, smacking of lips, and anonymous shouts from rolled-down windows, often followed by nervous laughter from passersby.

I am not alone in this. When I reached out to others on Twitter, asking if they would be willing to share their stories of street harassment, they responded with tweets of "too many stories!" and "I feel like every woman in a city like Chicago has more than one experience to share."

Do we have to stand by and take this kind of harassment from strangers, watch it happen to others without saying a word, or "just ignore it" like many of us have often been told? The answer is no; you shouldn't have to shut up and take it. You deserve to walk down the street without being harassed by strangers. You deserve to stand your ground, and it's okay to ask for help. 

Renee Davidson, Communications Director of the grassroots group Collective Action for Safe Spaces (CASS), says that she has received over 600 stories of street harassment in the D.C. metropolitan area.

"Our submissions are overwhelming from women, but men -- particularly LGBT and gender nonconforming men -- experience street harassment as well," says Davidson, " Women and men can take a stand against this by speaking up when they’re harassed, whether that means responding to the harasser, sharing their story with a group like CASS or Hollaback, or starting a conversation about street harassment with their friends and the men in their lives."

"Street harassment is also intensely normalized, such that being told to 'brush it off' has caused many women to accept it as just another part of moving in public. By speaking up about our experiences with street harassment, we are letting it be known that it's a problem."

Yes, men also face sexual harassment from strangers on street corners, and their experiences matter just as much. But when stories of male-on-female aggression pop up again and again, like this piece from the Huffington Post about a man running over a 14-year-old girl for refusing to have sex with him, it's time to dig deeper into what's perpetuating this chronic narrative. And then we should actually do something about it. 

Just as we should be educating men to not rape (instead of simply teaching women how to avoid rapey situations), we should also teach boys from a very young age that catcalling is degrading, hurtful, and harmful to the fabric of our society. Street harassment fuels rape culture, "blurring lines" to the point that many women can no longer tell the difference between a compliment and objectification. Leering at women on the street and hollering pointed comments about their bodies is the furthest thing from respectable behavior; it's blatant misogyny and patriarchy incarnate.

"Learning tips on bystander intervention is also a great way to help prevent sexual harassment," adds Davidson, "If you encounter someone street harassing another person, you can tell them to 'respect women' or any other interjection that feels natural for you."

We don't have to keep our mouths shut. We don't have to grin and bear it. No one deserves to be harassed on the way to the grocery store or while walking home at night, and it's time for us to start talking back.

Resources for education, inspiration and support: StopStreetHarassment.org,CollectiveActionDC.org, Catcalled.org, this Atlantic article on a new app to help women and members of the LGBTQ community report street harassment, the "Stop Telling Woman to Smile"project, and HollabackChicago!, an anti-harassment forum for Chicagoans. 

If you have a street harassment story to share, please sound off in the comment section below. Let's start talking."

degradation

"Commentary.

In February, I posted two pieces in Bed-Stuy on Tompkins and Halsey. These two pieces got the most attention of any pieces I’ve put up so far. Within a few days, someone had written his response to the work directly onto the posters. From there, a woman wrote a response to him. And it went on and, on with different hand-written comments creating this kind of interesting discussion. The pieces remained up until a week or so ago, when the phallic image was drawn. That’s when I decided to try to take them down. 

The “Stop Telling Women to Smile” piece remained in tact enough for me to include it in the exhibition. I thought it was important to present in the show, so that people could view these written reactions. "

-I love when assertive women scare men to such an extent that they have to resort to infantile shit like this.

-They think it will shut women up, but it really just fuels everything further, I hope they know that. 

--The “devolution” of the poster is more interesting to me than the originals, which I’ve reblogged before.

--The fact that a man decided to comment on the poster physically, and was the first to do so, says a lot. Whenever women defend ourselves we get these counter arguments. We get people in general, and not just men, trying to cut down our personal initiatives.And when women, like on the poster, attempt to hold a real discussion we get the brunt of the “dick solution” where we are told that we hate men, we haven’t had a “dick that was good” or we get a penis drawn on the poster meant to make a social commentary about our “place.”

--I’ve reblogged the individual posters before because I understand them as a victim of the suggestions. But I’m reblogging them now to show the attempt to keep women in their societal place in our culture.

--An excellent example of men not getting the point about street harassment.

--“You find our unwanted projections of our opinions of you to be bothersome? Well … well … well … DICKS, THAT’S WHAT!DICKS!!!”

zodiac shit

CATCALLING IS NOT A COMPLIMENT!

"I was talking with a friend yesterday who was complaining about her neighborhood. She says she can’t walk down the street without being whistled at or sometimes even followed by men. Here in Denver I can vouch for a similar sentiment. Being a young female walking down the street I usually feel more like a piece of meat than a human being. The problem when I try to explain this to men, however, is the huge disconnect between their intention and how women perceive it.

The usual conversation goes something along the lines of “but I mean it as a compliment.” In their minds women are supposed to want to be noticed on the street on a day-to-day basis. It means they look good; who wouldn’t want a stranger telling them that? Well, actually… when I’m alone walking down the street (day or night) I feel threatened by strange men who shout at me even when it’s “nice” things!

What it boils down to, in my opinion, is the patriarchal notion that women constantly want to please men through their looks. The idea is communicated to men that women should enjoy their attention, including in the form of whistles or cat-calls. The experience for women, however, is vastly different. When a woman is walking down the street she generally going somewhere. Her journey has a purpose and that purpose is not men’s appreciation of her physical appearance. In other words, when I’m walking down the street I want to get to where I’m going without being reduced to my body parts by a stranger. I think this is what cat-callers don’t understand about why cat-calling is harassment: it’s dehumanizing. And that’s never a compliment."

taken from: http://ucdwrc.wordpress.com/2012/05/24/why-catcalls-are-not-a-compliment/

"In the last week I have been honked at on five separate occasions, yelled at from cars three times, approached by strange men on the street twice, and given one completely unsolicited phone number.

Now, let me just make one thing clear — I have no issue with men (or women) finding me attractive, and respectfully approaching me and saying hello. Truly, I don’t. But there is a huge difference between respectfully saying “hey, I see you’re reading Game of Thrones, I just finished it! What did you think of…?” and telling me I have “nice titties” while I’m trying to cross the street.

I know this has been written about by others in ways that are a lot more articulate and interesting — but to be honest, I just need a place to express how fucking angry I am right now. So shitty men of Toronto, listen up:

Your catcalls are not a compliment. Honking at me from your lifted Ford Ranger doesn’t make me feel sexy, it makes me feel powerless and objectified. Disregarding the fact that I’m blatantly ignoring you and continuing to speak to me like I owe you my time and energy proves to me that you are not the type that takes ‘no’ for an answer. Shouting “good morning, gorgeous!” at me at 9:30 in the morning is not going to prompt me to sleep with you. Ever.

It’s important for you to know that your opinion on how I look is irrelevant, and I don’t have to take kindly to you thinking you are entitled to share your opinion about my body with me. Unless we are friends or I ask your advice, I do not give a shit about your opinion. It is not a compliment for a stranger to find me sufficiently fuckable because I don’t value myself on the basis of how many men want to have sex with me.

I am going to ignore you if you try to approach me at 11pm as I walk to the drug store. You know why? Because if I decide to be friendly and give you the time of day, if you decide to overpower me and get grabby, I will have police officers ask me why I was out so late alone, and why I talked to you in the first place. Your lack of human decency will be overlooked and I will be to blame. I will be asked why my skirt was too short, and be told that you just misconstrued my friendliness as flirting and that you thought I wanted it.

I wonder if you realize that I don’t leave the house without my phone not because I’m a text addict, but because I want to be able to call for help if I need it. I wonder if you know what it’s like to come up with an exit strategy or a witty retort in a split second just in case that guy walking towards you decides he’s got something to say — or worse.

I’m going to be real with you — I’m really tired of being nice. I’m tired of being told to smile, and I’m tired of saying “thank you” when dudes on the street compliment me. My body is not about you. My existence isn’t about you, and I don’t walk down the street for your enjoyment."

taken from: http://nessfraser.com/2012/06/29/your-catcalls-are-not-a-compliment/

a similar article: http://hellogiggles.com/no-catcalling-is-not-a-compliment-and-heres-why

rape 'jokes'

"You can't do jokes about black people or Asian people," the Australian comic Jim Jeffries told me last year, "but you can do a rape joke onstage now and there's not a problem." Interviewing several comedians for an article about offensiveness in comedy, I heard the same story time and again. American standup Scott Capurro told me that "talk about raping women [is] like the new black on the comedy circuit". Edinburgh comedy award-winner Brendon Burns talked about comedy's favourite neologism "rapey", meaning sleazy. "Only Britain," said Burns (another Aussie), "could make rape sound twee."

Examples of rape comedy are easy to find. Reginald D Hunter has a routine that begins, "civilisation couldn't have arisen without rape . . ." Jimmy Carr, of course, has several one-liners on the subject ("What do nine out of 10 people enjoy? / Gang rape."). In a characteristic play on his words, Carr has called his current show Rapier Wit.

When the Andrew Sachs controversy was still a twinkle in Jonathan Ross's eye, Russell Brand caused an outcry in Northampton when he prank-called the police live onstage claiming to have spotted a man wanted in the city for serious sex attacks. Even the women are at it: Geordie comic Sarah Millican has a skit about fetishistic rape roleplays with her boyfriend.

Various defences are cited for this new comedic fashion. It is comedy's job, say some, to probe the boundaries of the sayable, and to breach taboos – although some taboos are easier breached than others. It is taken as read, say others, that no harm is meant by these jokes; that they are funny precisely because everyone present – performers and audience – instinctively senses that rape is a shocking thing.

Some comics argue that rape jokes are justified as long as the joke's on them. Jeffries talked to me about his joke "about a girl who won't have sex with me . . . And the punchline is 'so I raped her'. But," he added, "I also have a joke later on about being in the toilet of a gay bar, and the punchline of that joke is 'so he raped me'. I throw it back and forth."

The counter-argument, expressed most forcibly by Jo Brand, is that today's comedians pose as plain-speakers and PC refuseniks in order to smuggle in the kind of misogynist comedy last seen in the 1970s. The likes of Carr, says Brand, "appeal to all the people out there who think, 'Where have all those delicious anti-women jokes gone? We miss them.'" Brand identifies "almost a desperation to make [comedy] more unpalatable than it was before".

But what's striking is how palatable the rape joke in comedy now appears to be. The young sketch troupe Late Night Gimp Fight were entirely unapologetic about their scene at Edinburgh last month, in which Sleeping Beauty wasn't kissed awake by her prince, but raped instead. Jeffries maintains this kind of thing is "not a problem". But, as rape becomes ever more commonplace a subject for comedy, it no longer seems terribly funny either.

Brian Logan

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/sep/10/rape-jokes-in-comedy

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As far as I can tell, the “joke” is usually that it wasn’t really rape at all, or it wasn’t a “real” rape, or it was a fun rape, or it was a deserved rape. Which, seeing as how rape victims get to hear that shit, completely seriously (and with completely serious consequences) from their rapist, friends, family, and cops, you might see as how it doesn’t come off as a joke so much as it comes off as... same shit, different day.

Let me tell you a thing you might not know: the inability to hear rape “jokes” without flashbacks, Hulk rage, and “air quotes” is one of the enduring parting gifts of a rapist.

Harriet J

to read the rest (do!) follow this link: http://www.fugitivus.net/2009/06/24/a-woman-walks-into-a-rape-uh-bar/ 

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- Street Harassment has nothing to do with sex and everything to do with power. Whether it's "Hey baby girl" or “You’d look good on me,” groping, public masturbation, or worse, these “compliments” aren’t about flirting or about chivalry either.

- If it makes you feel uncomfortable, it's not okay.

- If you feel intimidated, you DON'T need to 'take it as a compliment.'

- Street harassment is a gateway crime that makes other forms of gender-based violence OK.

- Studies conducted show that between 80-90% of women have been harassed in public.

- Street harassment may be the social and cultural norm, but it is far from OK. Street harassment teaches us to be silent, that taking action will only escalate the situation. While this isn’t bad advice, it has led us down a dangerous road. Ultimately, perpetrators realise they won’t be held accountable and continue to harass.

- Hollaback! was designed by a group of young people who were tired of being silenced and sought a simple, non-violent response. What has emerged is a platform where thousands of stories of street harassment have been told.

- We believe that by continuing to tell and map these stories, our voices will chip away at a culture that makes gender-based violence OK. Together we have the power to end street harassment, one Hollaback at a time.

http://ldn.ihollaback.org/about/

a submission from 'hollaback':

Was on my daily jog at 7.30am. Just to be clear, not that it matters but I was wearing a sports bra, long sleeved top and jogging jacket. I was just coming to my house so stopped running and I saw a car coming out of a garage. The car seemed to stop as it pulled out and the driver, a man in his late 30′s indicated he wanted to say something. I thought he wanted directions so I went over and he said

‘your tits look great jogging up and down the street’ I was shocked and said ‘f**k off’

He laughed at me and said ‘I could watch that all day!’ and he drove off. I was so angry. He seemed so happy with upsetting me. I felt exposed. Why should I be harassed as I am minding my own business jogging before work. I didn’t get his car registration, otherwise I would have reported it to the police. This man was scary and it worried me what he was capable of. However also it was just another example of harassment we experience throughout our lives. This has to stop. 

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